the nightmare.

                         John Henry Fuseli's The Nightmare.

This is exactly what happened to me last night at around 3:AM. I was fucking terrified. I woke briefly out of my sleep only to feel bound to my bed. Do you know how ridiculously terrifying it is to not be able to get out of bed at the moment you intend to jump up? Then when I finally arose, I looked over to what appear to be a dark figure in the fetal position in my doorway. Often in Black culture, it's referred to as "the witch riding your back." Not the dark figure on the floor though. I reallllly don't wanna know what the kooky shit was. In psychological terms, its called sleep paralysis.  The 80's baby in me thought to call Ghostbusters. 555-GHOST.  Me being a Christian, i prayed. And the little girl in me called  mommy. I didn't go back to sleep. I'm so dreading it tonight. :-/ 

Pray for me?

omigosh. i've become my worst fear.

i'm clingy. 

:faints:

i realized that today as i lit into my BF for not coming over today when he hesitantly said he was. i got off late. he said he wasnt coming. and i blew the fuck up. he said, "sharona, i was just over there day before yesterday. and the time before that? the day before that day." 'oh...right'

sorry. its only because i'm down here with almost no fucking friends and no life outside of work.i gotta fix this shit asap. that's it. i'm going back to sewing and latch-hooking. i told my mom to bring my damn sewing machine when she visited last month. smh. check for me at your local Michael's. lol

it's been a month...

if you watched my last video....i was celebrating my birthday and i also announced that i was officially in a relationship.

i'm getting bored. we can't just sit in the house all the time. that shit...is boring the hell out of me. can we go outside of the house every now and again? i like the house don't get me wrong but....i live here. lol. we can go SOMEWHERE even for the free-ski. i'm soooo NOT hard to please. :sigh: is it just me??

*wiz khalifa voice* yeahhhh bitch.

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new layout design. i love it! it only took me about 30 minutes to do. i know. i'm cold. sometimes when i'm looking at my blog and the layout is off...it'll kill my whole inspiration for writing. i went back and read through a lot of my old blogs from '08 and decided i need to start back to my old writing style. i just...feel like i lost my "mojo" so to speak. i started to overthink it. as an artist, whether you are a writer, actor, rapper, whatever your craft may be...don't worry about what others will think...don't second guess yourself. say what comes from your heart. don't worry about what others will say. just say it. if it evokes emotion...well good because that was its origin. ;) grow a set, men.

remember mike.

I love seeing little peeks into Michael's life. I always wondered what he was like. He seemed like such a good person. The weird thing is when I was a little kid, I used to always wish he was my Uncle. Mostly because we both grew up in Gary, Indiana, him and my Daddy have the same first and middle names, and everybody in my family is eccentric. See? We fam.. I mean who grows up in Gary? I guess three of the coolest people in the world. Me, Janet & Michael. LMAO! R.I.P Mike.

i'm so disappointed with my blogging right now. i'm just not connecting to it the way i want to. i'm still on an unofficial hiatus. what i will do is redesign it. and rethink it. and will be back soon. and i'm mad late but thanks for all the Bday wishes. no really, thanks guys. i did absolutely NOTHING for my birthday but *in my wiz khalifa slim skit voice* smoke my weed with the boo and his best friend who is supercool btw. that's all. and i was knocked out by 10:30. dead. LOL. 

i can't get over how much i love this song.

"its like i sent my love with a text two times. 

called 'cause i cared but i aint get no reply."

happy birthday Ye.

brb....

i will be back mid-june!!

once again. i'm uninspired. 

but i will brainstorm

and

BRB. ;)